Prayers & positive thoughts for all weathering the weather up north.

It's cold, it's cold, it is so very cold in the south. But I love it because it finally feels like FALL.
The only bad thing about it being cold is that it makes my fibromyalgia act up. I get very stiff & achy & it makes me feel like I can feel my bones from the inside. I walk around like I'm channeling a 94 year old woman. I need to push through it, though, as there is a lot to get done. I've tried several different medications: Cymbalta, Savella, Lyrica, Neurontin & Kepra, just to name a few. I get bad acne from most of them. Almost like an abscess that is big, red & very painful. Some of them have helped with the pain for a short time, some a lot, but the side effects aren't worth continuing to take them. I sing & the Savella took away my ability to control my vocal chords. After a couple months of taking any of them, I would get very moody, depressed & had suicidal thoughts & I found it difficult to stay patient with the children.

 As it stands right now I take pain medicine when it gets real bad. I am honest with my doctor & my husband about how many I take & when, so that I don't become addicted to them. I make sure that I only take one when I won't be driving &  I only allow myself to take one in a day. I've found that if I push myself to begin my chores I eventually get used to the feeling. What I mean is that I believe the pain is from the nerves & isn't from something I did to hurt myself, so if I can push through the pain it eventually doesn't feel as bad as it did when I  first started. Sometimes it's a little hard to get myself motivated to push through it, but I'm trying.

A shift is coming or in the process of happening. I am picking up on so much negative energy, I hardly can stand to be out & about. Trying to keep things positive around the house for the kids, but it is hard.

We had a delightful family meal yesterday, that my talented husband made for us, then onto pumpkin carving for the kids afterward. They were so excited to make faces on their pumpkins & watch daddy carve them. We will, however, wait to put them outside so as not to have them eaten or squished.  We have been extremely lucky in our neighborhood that no one goes out on mischief night. (Hope I didn't jinx myself )

Dreams, for me, haven't been worth mentioning. My husband had a dream last night that some terrorists kidnapped me & the children to make him blow up a bomb in some big city. Vague, I know, but it set him in a bad place when he woke up. He truly feared for our lives.  My husbands dreams are usually straight forward. You can definitely tell what they mean...usually. I & our youngest child are the one's that have wacky dreams. I'll have to pay attention to what dreams he has the rest of the week...see if there's a general theme to them. May be a premonition dream, one never knows. Hardly think it's about us though.

My dream was STUPID last night. I was me, as I am now, but was back in high school. The high school was local to where I live now, but was a mansion style home on the inside. I kept missing my classes & was upset because I didn't know where my children were, though they felt close & to my right side. I remembered that I didn't have any make-up on, so I went into the bathroom to "powder my nose". I felt a piece of dead skin so I peeled it off my nose & blew it off my finger. Next thing I know there is what looks like dead skin/snow falling from the ceiling. I am disgusted & curious. When I catch one in my hand & look at it, it turns out to be a super thin sliver of acrylic with a Halloween image stamped on it. I remember leaving the bathroom & walking in a crowded hallway. Then I woke up.  STUPID.